Watching this parade of nonentities blunder through one half-hearted peril after another, I found myself, heretic that I am, rooting for the xenomorph-T-Rex bastard, if only in hope of a mass extinction event that would put both humans and script out of their misery. The storyline stumbles about like a sedated raptor, random, twitchy, and never quite threatening. Not even the prospect of “heart disease miracle drugs” can raise the pulse.
Did anyone enjoy Jurassic World Rebirth? I would really like to hear what you liked about it.
As the seventh (7TH!!!) film in the franchise, it has the exact same issues as Star Wars Episode VII. Slavish devotion to the formula of the original and afraid to take too many risks. Why was the family even there? They were separated for so much of the runtime and the storyline didn’t even really intertwine, it was just space filler.
I appreciated the body horror dinosaur, but they didn’t even do enough with it, just a big baddie in reserve for the climactic scare.
At this point, if you really want to keep the series going (debatable), get fucking crazy with it: “We built the dinosaur park in the one location they could never escape, THE MOON! Oh no they escaped! Wait, are those raptors actually wielding laser guns?! Pew pew!”
Yesssssss. Jurassic Star Wars VIII!! Sith Raptors and Jedi Allosaurus.
I for one welcome Jurassic Park shifting gears to the Deathworlders/Salvage universe