I don’t think you would use Persons as the alternative there - just “they”. My sister and her friends, wow they travel a lot!

It’s not busy but Ask Lemmy NSFW is pretty nice, open-minded and certainly hard to shock.

As others have explained, waking up at the wrong point in a sleep cycle feels crappy. But also as the night turns to morning, your sleep cycles change and sleep becomes lighter - waking up is a process, not a moment. So get up when you wake up naturally and you should be good, but also keeping to a schedule helps, so if you are naturally waking up at 7am or whatever, going past that time can interfere with, well, falling awake.

I get you though - so often I feel like sleep is so close by I just want to go back.

My husband handles this with coffee, he gets up, makes coffee, drinks it in bed (while I sleep through all this) and then either feels awake, or, if he does go back to sleep the caffeine helps him wake back up, like a coffee nap. I can’t do that, prefer to wake up then coffee a few hours later, but it works for him.

I bring a picture of myself with the haircut I want.

Husband says tight fade, zero to very short on top and that gets him what he wants, he goes to the same barber lady all the time, she doesn’t speak English and he doesn’t speak Spanish but they still manage to communicate the haircut information.

Obligatory FUCK TICKETMASTER!

As people have already noted, the $20-$25 shows were different than a modern arena show, I saw Soundgarden with Voivod for $25ish at a local outdoor small venue in the 1990s, and have seen other acts there recently for between $50-$75 (the Alabama Shakes, Cimafunk), that seems like normal inflation.

Arena shows I honestly don’t remember what we paid for tickets to see big bands, but I sure remember general admission, running to get to the front, not being able to move once there, and the random groping that always happened. I don’t go much to big shows now (or even back then) and have never been to a stadium show.

I don’t think it’s unreasonable for artists to make money on performance, rather than on sales of recorded music. Not sure what the value of a show like that is, but probably more than it was back when tours were done to promote album sales.

I wonder though. Two things - one, I think you probably look better than you think, if you dance and go to the gym I’m sure you are already in good shape and not too skinny. You probably look better than you think, it’s normal to see yourself with a hypercritical eye, try to look in the mirror and pretend it’s someone else. And as someone else mentioned, ask for feedback from your friends, who see you more objectively.

Two - what kind of looks, that you think are so far off from yours? I mean, if you are finding plenty of women who meet your standards, maybe this is a misapprehension and you are not as picky as you think, nor as far apart in looks from those you find attractive . If you have impossible standards, that’s certainly something to work on, but maybe you are just thinking about this in a way that makes it feel impossible when it’s not.

It can never hurt to take a step away for awhile and just work on yourself though. Be a person who you like, keep doing the things you love and enjoy them, let go of trying to date for a time, be nice to yourself.

You have the stats of one of the most attractive skinny guys I’ve been with. I was also way skinny at that point in my life (5’9" 115lb - I am 150 now at midlife and people seem to see even this as thin somehow, I don’t understand it), which made things a little awkward but I really think very tall and skinny is one of the ideal body types for a man, and you are so tall I think most women would perceive you as ‘bigger than them’ even if you are close in mass.

Also the best lover I ever had was a guy a couple inches shorter than me and whip lean and not even socially ‘normal’. Husband now is my height, strong as fuck and padded, and like OP seems to fear being ‘skinny’, as a lady this is an almost incomprehensible fear, I have feared being fat always but skinny is fine.

Maybe because ‘bird feeder’ implies they are trying to feed birds?

I really hated the possums in my old neighborhood because they would always crawl into the soffit and have babies, destroy things I could not afford to fix, and poop stinky poop in my attic. But in my new slightly bougier neighborhood the possums are so cute and just run around eating bugs. Rats I can’t bring myself to hate, and squirrels just seem like cute fluffy rats. So I can’t hate them but goddam it I have never harvested even one fully ripe tomato because they destroy them. I do hate that.

I think of it as a flavored seltzer.

Aspartame is the sweet flavor and unspecified “natural flavors” do the rest.

I don’t drink it often anymore, but it’s great for a no calorie treat. No it won’t give you diabetes but you shouldn’t drink it instead of water. It isn’t water.

This helps. First, I think work on your own self confidence. A dancer’s build is an ideal body type for a whole bunch of people. If you feel like more definition in your arms would help YOU (I don’t think it’s the sticking point looks wise but might help you see your own hotness), do push ups, and weighted squats and lunges will help with the dancing, skinny is the easiest body type to get into shape, such a small adjustment.

On the flirting, yes obvious is good, and funny, remember you are just practicing here and enjoy yourself. Subtle is likely to be missed.

On your actual question, I am older so have been through dry spells and remember feeling frustrated way more than bitter. Build a good life you enjoy, and it may be attractive to others, or perhaps not, but either way you will have a good time. I don’t mean there aren’t external forces, but your own attitude and actions are what you have the most control over.

“I’m not so into skinny guys” sounds like an excuse, if you are getting it a lot I think there is something else going on here, not all women even have a type and some surely like skinny guys, some of the hottest men I’ve been with were so skinny, it can be a very attractive look on a man.

Since you say it’s your own standards, what do you mean? Do you think you are sort of batting out of your league looks-wise? You are already dancing so your body is probably in good shape, is there anything else that makes you think you are not physically attractive? May I ask how old you are?

You are outgoing and social, perhaps try practicing flirting? Like, without trying to take it any further?

Rural is difficult. Do you need to live out in the middle of nowhere? Work and kids activities (I have lots of kids) are the main ways I’ve met people but cities are full of many different people, in the outlying areas you may literally know everyone in town already, there aren’t new people to meet.

If you are up for it, a whole new start might be good for you. Maybe apply for jobs in a nearby city?

Wow. I guess either I am tall or the handles on my tote bags are shorter. They have short handles AND are scratching the ground? How big are these bags, or how short are you?

I’m an accountant and like it. It’s funny, we have the most fun at work, the whole finance team is great.

I think saying you want to move away from clinical and towards the business side is not at all silly, nor does it sound like you are a quitter. Moving from operations to administration is often viewed as moving up, maybe you can just say you want the job as a step in a different direction?

And having to be careful during sex is a drag. Big, good. Bigger, not better.

I’m in Florida, and Christmas does get a tree but nobody expects snow, lol. But it’s our cool season, still winter. What bothers me more is the harvest festivals in fall. Nothing much grows here in summer, in fall we are just ramping up the garden, so in that way it’s more like spring in other cooler places.

No, probably not, and I live in a mid-sized city, so between metro and suburban I guess. Again, I do think it would be safe and overwhelming percentage of the time just wouldn’t FEEL safe.

What sort of help? Get something for me while I wrangle the kid? Sure. Also blocking if they are running off and turning them in the right direction, sure.

No I wouldn’t have handed off a baby to a random dude, even though I’m sure that 95% of the time it would be safe to.

Anectodally - the young people I knew who were going to sit out the presidential election because they were so mad it was just two ancient white men, or were mad because Gaza, now say they will vote for “whoever the democrats run”.

Which is only two people, but she has at least some votes that otherwise would have gone to nobody.

Yeah I am a certified member of the itty bitty committee and am currently in a perfectly fit 34D, and my measurements would put me in 32DD.

Those letters just don’t really mean anything without the band size. Nobody, literally nobody, would look at me and think “D cup”.

Bras really need more than two measurements. I need the band of a 32-34, the wire diameter dimensions of a 34D and the volume of what I think of as a 34 B. I can find this in particular models of bras but it would be nice to have it on the label.